Hi! You sound like somebody I would love to get to know better - while I don't listen to a lot of metal anymore, I will always have a soft spot for the genre and the people in the "scene" so to say. Metallers are definitely some of the nicest people I have met so far. I might also give some of the bands you listed a try since I've not really ventured into the Black Metal subgenre so far but am always willing to expand my musical taste :)

I am also very much intrigued by the stand-up comedy part and would consider myself to have quite the sense of humour ;)

Friends?